In this Tribe group coaching session on the Outlier's Edge Podcast, Niiamah Ashong coaches two coaches on the difference between defaulting and being intentional. One explores how to bring more energy, variety and connection into the spaces she creates for her community, and the other chooses one small act of care to take as soon as the call ends. What emerged is that for high achievers energy comes before productivity, and the smallest next step is where a big goal gets practiced.
Episode at a glance
- Host: Niiamah Ashong, coach to outlier leaders
- Show: Outlier’s Edge Podcast, released October 15, 2020
- Format: session, 57 minutes
- Topics: Defaulting versus being intentional, Speaking yourself into the room, Energy before productivity, Connection beyond the screen, The next small step toward a big goal, Peace versus quiet
What this session is about
One leader works with unconventional humans and helps them remember how brilliant they are. She runs a cohort of professional women that takes on imposter syndrome and fear, because she wants women's voices heard in the room, and she draws on years in corporate law and the tech industry, often as the only one in the room. She designed a location independent coaching practice so she could work with people all over the world. The other is a life coach whose mission is to change the way people communicate, and who creates spaces with impact makers and supports them as they create the impossible.
What emerged
Niiamah Ashong hears the talk of video call fatigue as fatigue itself, and invites the first leader to make her spaces the antidote to the default her clients face, using her own flexibility to help them create something different. With the second leader, a story from home becomes a practice in bringing care to what he cares about, with ten minutes of action right after the call. Niiamah Ashong closes on the lens of the session: for high achievers productivity and action will always be there, and the real question is whether they have the energy to go forth and do it.
Questions this episode answers
What is the difference between defaulting and being intentional as a leader?
Niiamah Ashong describes defaulting as entering a space the way people typically do, with a bio, a title and past accomplishments, or simply going along with whatever life handed them before. Being intentional means choosing how to show up, which in this session starts with each person speaking themselves into the room by sharing who they are and what they stand for.
Why isn't productivity the real problem for high achievers?
Niiamah Ashong says that when people ask him how to be more productive, they are usually looking in the wrong place, because for high achievers productivity and action will always be there. The question he asks instead is whether they actually have the energy to go forth and do it.
How can a coach create more connection for clients who spend their days on screens?
Niiamah Ashong suggests giving a group more dimensions than a video call, such as members recording themselves dancing to a favorite song or writing poetry and sharing it in the group space. He also invites the coach to make her spaces the antidote to the default, so people entering them get something crafted in a different way rather than more of the same.
How do you turn a big goal into action today?
One leader in the session, working on becoming a man who takes instant action, chooses to take ten minutes as soon as the call ends to bring care to something he cares about. The other leader takes away that the big lofty goal is always predicated on the next small step, and names a workout as hers.
What is the difference between peace and quiet?
Niiamah Ashong shares a story from a mindfulness course about a competition to represent peace, won not by a pristine meadow but by a crane with her baby beside a tumultuous waterfall. For him it was the peace that can come with life all around, and peace and quiet are two different things.
In their words
It is in the innocuous moments that our future is actually created and the world is actually shaped.
Niiamah Ashong
Peace and quiet are two different things.
Niiamah Ashong
For high achievers productivity and action will always be there. The element here is do you actually have the energy to go forth and do it.
Niiamah Ashong
Key moments
01:35 – Defaulting versus being intentional
03:37 – Speaking yourself into the room
12:48 – A cohort for professional women
14:23 – What would make this world-changing
29:18 – Connecting through all five senses
36:27 – Not screen fatigue, just fatigue
42:01 – Peace is not the same as quiet
50:48 – Ten minutes of care, right now
53:52 – Big goals and the next step
55:23 – Energy comes before productivity
About Niiamah Ashong
Niiamah Ashong is a coach to outlier leaders, host of the Outlier’s Edge Podcast, and founder of the Trailblazer Collective. He coaches leaders who are creating something only they can make: a company, a body of work or a movement. Make a difference with your difference.
Work with Niiamah: 1:1 with Niiamah | World of Difference
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