Fari Eskandari, a spiritual health and wellness coach with 30 years as a fitness trainer and life coach, joins Niiamah Ashong on the Outlier's Edge Podcast to talk about self-care, self-love and self-respect. She shares how she let go of what she'd held on to for years, stopped judging others and now builds herself up from scratch every day. What emerged is greatness as a way of being, one she believes every person can find within themselves.
Episode at a glance
- Guest: Fari Eskandari, Spiritual health and wellness coach, fitness trainer and life coach for 30 years
- Host: Niiamah Ashong, coach to outlier leaders
- Show: Outlier’s Edge Podcast, released September 20, 2022
- Format: conversation, 42 minutes
- Topics: Self-care that goes deeper, Self-worth, self-love and self-respect, Imposter syndrome is never a quick fix, Letting go of judgment, Coaching with authentic words, The greatness within
What Fari brought to the conversation
Fari Eskandari is a spiritual health and wellness coach who has been a fitness trainer and life coach for 30 years, helping people gain clarity in their self-worth, self-love and self-respect. Fitness is what she breathes, a gift she inherited from her father, an athlete in his own time, and she kept going until she became a trainer, even when she was told many times she would never make it. A longtime client told her that her words are so authentic, and she realized that what people were asking her for is called coaching; she certified as a coach in 2016 and came to see herself as a health and wellness coach when the gyms closed in the pandemic. She earned a black belt at 46, and she says she has a PhD of all A pluses from life.
What emerged
Niiamah Ashong sees a fierce, unapologetic and incredibly tender love in Fari Eskandari, and he names greatness as her way of being: you can't keep greatness down, and wherever she goes, from fitness to health and wellness, she is great there. She extends it to everyone, saying that if every person digs deep and sees their own greatness, they will transform and stop judging others. That's why she is so big on self-care, self-love and self-respect: once you achieve them, there is no way not to see your greatness.
Questions this episode answers
What does real self-care look like?
Fari Eskandari says self-care goes deeper than hair color, eyelashes or a facelift; it's when you respect yourself and find ways to be with you. That can be walking outside by yourself, writing, painting, a long bath with nice music, or looking in the mirror and telling yourself you love yourself and have a lot to offer.
Is imposter syndrome something you get over once?
Fari Eskandari says imposter syndrome is never a quick fix: it comes and goes, the way you get hungry again a few hours after you eat, so you have to work on it constantly. She takes pride in doing that work first with herself and then with clients all over the world.
What makes a coach's words land with clients?
A client who has been with Fari Eskandari for nearly two decades told her that her words are so authentic, because there are no games and she says it like it is. That's when she realized that what clients were asking her to do is called coaching.
How can a leader stop judging other people?
Fari Eskandari stopped wasting the energy she had spent for years judging others. When a negative thought about someone starts, she pictures a little version of herself saying you can't go there, and she turns it into a positive acknowledgement instead.
Why shouldn't you force change?
Fari Eskandari says that when you force anything, whether a relationship or a friendship, it won't last. Her advice is to appreciate it, acknowledge it and work towards it, but don't force it.
In their words
Every day is a new day and every day you feel different and every day you need to build yourself up from scratch.
Fari Eskandari
I have a PhD of all A pluses from life.
Fari Eskandari
You can't keep greatness down.
Niiamah Ashong
Key moments
01:31 – Fierce, unapologetic, tender love
04:03 – Coaching self-worth and self-love
11:46 – Becoming a trainer against the odds
13:47 – Why a client calls her authentic
16:21 – What self-care really is
19:56 – Building yourself up every day
21:28 – Catching judgment before it starts
26:35 – How much longer to hold on
33:46 – The greatness within every person
37:26 – You can't keep greatness down
About Niiamah Ashong
Niiamah Ashong is a coach to outlier leaders, host of the Outlier’s Edge Podcast, and founder of the Trailblazer Collective. He coaches leaders who are creating something only they can make: a company, a body of work or a movement. Make a difference with your difference.
Work with Niiamah: 1:1 with Niiamah | World of Difference
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