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June

What Recurring Thoughts Drive You?

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“Yes, you can!” No, this is not the Obama slogan although the man had a point. We often find ourselves faced with recurrent obstacles that challenge our minds before we set out to engage. Today’s video talks of how to use those doubtful thoughts as a driving force.

 

Video Synopsis and Additional Links

Today I wanted to share with you how transformative the last few weeks have been for me. Lately, there’s been a shift which has come in terms of a recurrent thought. A question/statement that has been driving me for years.

One of the things you might know about me is that I have been a young leader who has excelled in a lot of things very quickly. I consider myself to be an outsider of most things that I do. It is part of the reason why inclusion is such a big value for me because I somehow learn how to thrive being on the outside.

To be honest it wasn’t that I learned how to be isolated and alone, no, I learned how to be different and almost protective of how different I am.

A Recurrent Thought

I have been able to integrate that in a lot of different ways but there was a question/ statement that kept coming to mind. This recurrent thought drove a lot of what I did. It drove me to see myself as an outsider and it has served me quite well up until this point.

Before I share this thought, I would like to just pause and give you a chance to reflect. What is that thought that keeps coming to your mind as you go out and pioneer in your own world or keeps you from pioneering?

For me, that statement that kept coming up is: “I am not supposed to be here”. This has done wonders for me because it has allowed me to be able to take a stance and say: “I am not supposed to be here and because I am here anyway, it is a bonus and there’s nothing I can do right or wrong”.  Today I want to give you a chance to reflect on your own recurrent thought.

A New Thought

Recently, I had two mastermind conversations where I got codes from my mentor twice in the same day and essentially what ended up happening was that I realized I no longer needed to try to be who I was.

A new sensation was born: “you can do that?!” That right now is the thought that runs through my mind and it has replaced the “I’m not supposed to be here” sentence.  To be honest I don’t know how it is going to change things because I feel like I’m coming from a different place. I feel that for this part in my journey this is the more empowering place to be. It’s will guide the way that I show up for each of you.

This is the first live video that I have made specifically within the Pioneer oasis as opposed to just generally outputting it out to the world because: “I can do that!” I am able to look at that and find areas where I can inspire and surprise myself and others.

As I exercise my freedom, my North Star is now pointing in the way that triggers that particular question, Why not:

  • Start a podcast
  • Have multiple means of coaching people
  • Make a retreat in Bali
  • Triple your income within two years of leaving your professional job

Question: “You can do that?”

Answer: “Yeah, yeah you can!”

I’m going to be coming from this place, pioneers because this is for you. As pioneers, these thoughts may be frequent and how we let them shape our world is important. I just wanted to give us a little bit of time to get some perspective on that.

Guide the Lens

What would be a more empowering thought that can help and guide what drives you? Guide the lens that you look through things? Leave a message in the comments. Let me know what your thoughts are and we’ll go ahead and continue to build on this.

The Gifts of being Triggered

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We are all unique beings with talents that set us apart. Unfortunately, some of us may not have discovered their strengths and today’s video looks to correct that.
Video Synopsis and Additional Links
I just had a wonderful coaching conversation where I was coaching a client of mine who is a pioneer. This is someone who is incredibly powerful and has 25 years of experience working in their industry. In our conversation, something showed up that has been recurrent in a lot of my coaching conversations with others. It made me want to come out here and share this message that is around exploring the gifts of being triggered. We live in a world where typically we are out there telling ourselves: “this thing triggered me”. We get annoyed, angry or hurt and we actively take the time to avoid it or get into the place where we just allow the triggering to take place. I have spent my whole life as an outsider and have been able to create a lot of success in leadership, growth, abundance, and joy. Things also trigger me and what I found useful for other pioneers is that when things trigger, rather than being defensive or angry about it, there’s a different stance that I take.

Look for the Gift in Being Triggered

Today I want to talk about the gift of being able to figure out your unique strengths. This thing gives you what I like to call that 100x impact (10 times a result for 10 percent of the effort). As a pioneer a lot of what you’re doing is shooting out, going forth and creating something new for people to explore and experience. You are creating something that others aren’t doing. That exposes who you are, what you know, your credibility and your confidence. It puts you in a place where you are visible and with that, you might experience fear. One of the things I like to do is to speak that fear into existence. The aspect of being triggered allows you to see something about yourself that you may not have even known. Presently I can easily be called on to give a speech at any moment: like “Niiamah there are these people here, give a speech”! I’ll be honest, for the longest time, this would annoy me because I would be like Why:
  • Do I need to give a speech
  • Can’t you give a speech
  • Can’t you do this
  • Does it always need to be me

What do others see in you

Do you have something in you which prompts people to keep asking the same things from you? Well for me it was speaking and out of these annoying situations came out my real gift. I realized that I can walk in at any given time, situation or topic and as long as I have a crowd I can just talk. Talking is not all there is, while it is an important part of my gift, there is something more. There is a way my message is received due to my connecting with the audience. I do not need to be afraid of getting in front of people and sharing. I can just give myself the space to really go forth and share a message from a place that is heartfelt, real and open. There’s something about that there that I didn’t realize was actually a unique strength of mine.

Evaluate Yourself

I want to raise your awareness around your triggers and to offer you a different way of looking at them. Rather than being upset because of the various ways you may be triggered, give yourself a chance by asking a different question. That is to look at the situation as someone shining a light onto your special unique gift. I have noticed that it is hard for us to actually see our strengths.  The fact that it triggers you says something. It means that it is important because there are a lot of things that happen around you where you just don’t even notice. That is a clue that you are stepping into what is actually a unique strength.

Dealing With the Triggers

Today I want to offer you a way to deal with those triggers. Whenever someone says something that triggers you, slow down and just say these two words: “thank you”. E.g. Thank you that feels good to hear or thank you I didn’t know that about myself. Etc. When people were saying things like: “when you walk into a room you light up the room” my response would be, “thank you, I have no clue what I’m doing. Would you mind telling me more because this seems to be important and I don’t know enough about it so I love to hear about it from your perspective”. This has transformed the way that I’ve shown up for myself and it has allowed me to now know that when I walk into a room I can do it with all the energy that I want. When i step into a room, I know I am providing service this is regardless of how dead quiet the room is. I don’t have to feel bad about it because I know that I am sharing one of my greatest gifts with them. I didn’t know this until someone told me.

A Different Approach

I want to offer this to you: slow down and see the gift in being triggered. As pioneers, we are leaders who may have risen quickly in our careers and at the same time, we may have this hidden feeling of being an outsider. If we don’t take the time to really absorb and receive the gift of what is triggering us, we won’t be able to reach our true potential. We won’t be able to see the true things that make us unique, and we’ll spend our time struggling to fit in. There’s a gift in being triggered and part of that gift can help you figure out what your unique strength is. Go ahead and leave a comment I would love to know any thoughts that you have from this video. Know that your journey is important what you’re doing is important. When people make you feel a certain way in their comments or requests, please pay attention to it. We need you to be more different we need you to be more you. Onto your next frontier…journey on

No need to Apologize

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This world is colored in diversity. Now more than ever, cultures are constantly coming together and new ones are birthed. Imagine how one dimensional the world would be if we all looked, thought and behaved the same. Today’s video talks of living unapologetically.
Video Synopsis and Additional Links
I am just going to dive in here and say: you don’t need to apologize for who you are. I find that this sentiment comes up a lot as I am working with different people. They will say something that is completely innocuous. This statement will often represent how they’re feeling in the moment, or how they see the world. This will then cause them to apologize and typically my response is: “you don’t need to apologize to me, I’m okay”. So today I wanted to get on here and just share this message because there is something that is beyond that. Trust me, Niiamah is not impervious to the apologies. The real reason why this is so important to me is that when it comes to it there’s an area of the apology that diminishes who you are or how you show up.

Showing up opens the floor for more

I need you to show up because when you show up it gives me the space to show up myself. So when you apologize you’re actually taking away space for the two of us. when you show up, we are both able to expand, grow and have a chance to bring out what we need to into the conversation. Now look if you do something really crappy towards me, please apologize because that is just good manners. However, the element of your existing, experimenting and finding out more and stretching yourself in different areas is no reason for you to apologize to me. In fact, you need to say sorry for not showing up authentically, not for being who you are. Here’s to your next frontier…journey on

Are You Hiding the Best Parts of You?

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In a world where bright stars and huge impact makers graze history books, one can get intimidated into feeling like they are not good enough. Today’s video talks of revealing your best parts regardless of the potential backlash and the limiting question “Who are you to…?”.

Video Synopsis and Additional Links

I have a question for you; is there something in your life that you thrive at but haven’t shared with the world? I recently had a conversation with someone who reminded me of an event that happened some time back. I was at work and we were working on a project for a client which was going to require our commitment through some late nights extending into the weekend.

Who Am I

The upcoming weekend was Martin Luther King Day. My manager said something that was pretty innocuous at the moment but it has stayed with me. She said: “we might have to work through the holiday weekend but let’s be real Martin Luther King Day is kind of a fru-fru holiday anyway!“

After that happened I just sat there dumbfounded. Look at it this way, I am a regular guy who is working towards building a business, I work with people and give my all on a daily basis. Here I am talking about joy, possibility, inclusion, and authenticity so if Martin Luther King JNR who had so much gravitas and changed the entire world can be considered fru-fru then who am I?

Hiding Behind Resentment

During the conversation mentioned earlier, I realized that was feeling some disdain and resentment towards myself and the people who were all over social media posting very vulnerable things. I’m actually very fortunate because I surround myself with people who are willing to share their truth to the world.

At that moment though, all that vulnerability seemed a bit much and that is really interesting coming from me. My friend came out and questioned my stance, asking whether I had a problem with the posts or was I really envious of them because they were doing what I desired to do but was afraid.

One of my strengths is the ability for me to help and support other people. While I’m doing that and building a business and my life, at times it all feels incredibly fru fru. I want to be taken seriously and I want to have a good time and that’s not always easy to do.

Not Holding Back

What are some of the things that you are great at, that you’re hiding and why? There might be clues as to why you might be hiding the best parts of you, for me, it was the word fru fru.

I dropped that little nugget there so that you can allow your strength to shine through the work you do. I’m excited to bring this through to 2019 because I know that when I come from a joyous place things line up for me. So I’m not holding back  and I am not hiding it anymore.

Leave a message and tell me what you are exceptional. What have you have been hiding/ holding back or just afraid to put out there for a fear of backlash. Maybe you know something that might require additional vulnerability just to show how great you are.

Here’s to your next frontier…journey on.

Give Yourself Some Grace This Year!

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In this fast-paced world, we set goals and work hard to achieve them, however, challenges come and the journey can get rough. Today’s video reminds you to give yourself some grace as you move forward.
Video Synopsis and Additional Links
As we start off the New Year, I have something in mind that is rather counterintuitive. I recently was part of an eye-opening conversation. It led me into a place where I now see the need to record some of my coaching sessions. This will give people a chance to explore for themselves and get the insights revealed therein. I will post this link soon. The conversation at hand, however, went to a very interesting place and what came up was the concept of giving ourselves grace. I thought that was very compelling especially now that we are starting out the year. This is the time when we’re thinking of resolutions, goals, and visions. We are coming out of the holidays and the physical season of winter, perhaps an internal season of winter as well where it feels like you have been hibernating.

Offering Grace

This is typically the season where there is a pull towards wanting to get a lot done because of the need to start the year off strong. I get it and trust me I will not mess with that energy at all. I don’t want to slow anyone down but at the same time, I want to offer the word grace back. Let us give ourselves a bit of grace as we:
  • Re-enter our daily routine
  • Look back to what we have done in 2018 or in the years prior.
Wherever you are right now, give yourself a bit of grace where you are able to say; this is where I am and this is what I need at this moment, and use that to continue going forward. This is easy, to be able to look back and come up with a list of:
  • All the things I didn’t get done
  • All the things I want to do (goals)
  • This is what I will do to achieve my set goals

My message for you Today

  • Slow down a little bit as you start off this year
  • Slow down as you move forward into what is coming up next for you
  • Take time to breathe into it all
  • Take time to enter it from a place of grace
  • Rest into your gifts and enter it from a place of grace
This is what came up during our conversation and I just thought it was it’s such a beautiful way of capturing: “resting into your gifts”. Give yourself the grace of not having to work hard in order to get the same results, if not better. Get in touch with me because I am very curious as to what this grace looks like for you as you start off your new year. If there’s one thing you can do to introduce more grace into the start of your year, what would it be? Here is to your next frontier…journey on.

Step Out of Your Comfort Zone and be Seen

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The comfort zone is undoubtedly cozy, hence the name.  “A Ship is always safe at shore but that is not what it was built for.” Albert Einstein. Today’s video looks at the fear associated with stepping out of the comfort zone and the beauty found of the other side of that fear.

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Video Synopsis and Additional Links

I was recently talking to a good friend of mine who is an entrepreneur and has been running his own online business for the last ten years.

You see, my friend has gained success in building his business selling products online, and building a platform based on text and courses. In one of our conversations a few months ago, it was clear that he was really kind of stuck.

Even though his business was growing and he was getting more people involved, the fulfillment wasn’t being experienced. What came up was that he wanted to connect with people in a completely different way than he had been doing before. So he wanted to be able to do live videos.

Pushing Past the Fear

This right there, wanting to show up in a completely different way, is about changing up and going on to the next level! For him, the next level was the place around where he was stuck. He was asking himself: “Am I ready to be seen again? Am I ready to be seen in this light?”

What was showing up was: “Do I trust myself to just get in front of a camera, and have that be okay? I know when I write I’m able to sit down and edit and use the opportunity to cultivate an image of myself. However, but can I really go out in front of the people from the video and just express myself, share what is on my mind and really be seen?”

It wasn’t really about creating the video, but about, “Can I be seen?” It was about being able to start integrating that video into his business.

The Other Side of the Coin

We had a session discussing it and as I served him on it, he realized for himself that, part of his success comes from just following what works for him. Just letting go of all the heaviness around it. It got to the point where he finally got it: “I’ve done this before in multiple ways and multiple versions!”

I am happy because he was sharing his gratitude, what he has accomplished in the last few months. How phenomenon it has been as a result of being able to let go of a need to look a certain way, and actually just being seen along the way!

He did go ahead to create his first video, put it on YouTube, and has been growing his subscriber list on a regular basis! The text he puts on there now drives more people to those YouTube videos – more views and subscribers in the past months!

The Fruits of Living Past the Comfort

That isn’t even what excites me because that has been going on for months. What excited me was how he was able to once again experience what it is like to be a subject matter expert.

It is five months since we talked about the first video and what it took to be seen in a different way. It has come far beyond where that initial conversation started: it is more than just being seen but now he is able to create.

The reason I decided to share this with you, is because he said; “Niiamah, I’m so excited, every night that it is hard for me to go to sleep! I’m just so excited by the things I am doing.”

It wasn’t about him making the video, no, it was about whether or not he trusted himself to really be seen. Whether or not he trusted himself to go out and create, on the fly….to pursue a totally new way of being seen in the world.

Choosing to allow yourself to be seen

There is something there, about the trust area. I get it because there is that idea of how I am supposed to look. How am I supposed to make sure that when I show up in a new way I bring more of myself into the equation?

In his case, it was just the physical face, but for a lot of us, it is different things. For me, it is playing with speaking and sharing stories in a way that I haven’t done in the past. I’m playing with if I’m going to allow myself to be vulnerable enough here. He is playing with, the idea of living with the problem of living in the problem. (June didn’t understand the underlined part…)

Through that phone conversation, I got a chance to see what is on the other side of getting out of your comfort zone. Not even getting out of your comfort zone, but living outside of your comfort zone.

Consider this

You will allow more of yourself to be seen if you can allow yourself to let go.

Ask yourself: what would be different in your life, business, career if you were to get rewards:

  • Not in spite of who you are but because of whom you are
  • Because you gave people a chance to see you as you are stepping out of your comfort zone

I would love to start a conversation around it. It is important for a pioneer to be seen stepping out of our comfort zone.

  • We might be rejected
  • We might not be accepted
  • It feels very real when it is about your money, livelihood, and sense of being connected to other people

But then again: what if stepping out of the comfort zone and really being seen, brought you more abundance, connection, and joy?

Leave a comment down in the box below wherever you are.  On to your next frontier… Journey on!

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